gawker published a 'piece' by me

re being arrested at nyu's bookstore for 'trespassing'

"3x contest" re Richard Yates

Contest 1 entries: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
Contest 2 entries: 1 (126+ min.) 2 (48+ min.) 3 (19+ min.)
Contest 3 entries: 1 (7 people)
Illegitimate entries: 1 (not all participants are "in frame") 2 (not > 70% "on topic," I feel) 3 (not all participants are "in frame"/visible at the relevant moment) 4 (not > 70% "on topic," I feel) 5 (uses an obvious "gimmick," to a large degree, I feel, and doesn't seem not > 70% "on topic")

Prizes: $800, "'special' galley" (video), "'private' coin collection" (video), "boxes of drafts" (see previous videos), [other things] (see below). Free books: every "legitimate-seeming" entry will get one of my books free, email binky.tabby [at] gmail.com which book & your address if your entry is linked above. Submission process: post your entry on the internet, comment the link in the comments section of this blog post.

CONTEST 1: TYPE OR "GMAIL CHAT" ABOUT "RICHARD YATES" AND/OR "TAO LIN"

Type 1000+ words or 500+ "Gmail chat lines" about Richard Yates, "Tao Lin's second novel," and/or "Tao Lin," using the following as reference: internet, official site, HTMLGIANT review/coverage of this blog post, Alt Report, Fishkind review, author description, Justin Taylor, [coverage "generated" by this blog post, listed above].

The longest "legitimate-seeming" entry will receive: $250 check + "'special' galley"/"box of drafts" ("longest" means "largest word-count," "1 Gmail chat line" = "2 words," if you promote your entry and it is linked by a site, or is already on "such a site," w/ an Alexa "traffic rank" below 50k your "prize-length" will be increased by 25%, 50% if below 20k.

Tips: seems "easier" maybe if you title sections of your "piece" in this manner, each title being a "topic"/[specific link] that you then "muse upon." Entries do not need to be positive, if you "hate me" and want a free book "feel free" to "shit out" an essay in ~10 minutes "shit-talking" me in a cathartic, stream-of-consciousness manner.

CONTEST 2: FILM AN INTERVIEW/DISCUSSION ABOUT "RICHARD YATES" AND/OR "TAO LIN"

Film a "live, 2+ minute" interview about "Richard Yates" and/or "Tao Lin" using things listed in "contest 1"/[anything] as reference, w/ the person being interviewed "in frame" while speaking. To increase the "prize-length" of the movie you can "upgrade" the interview into a "discussion" (3+ people; see next paragraph).

The longest "legitimate-seeming" entry will receive: $250 check + "coin collection"/"box of drafts" ("longest" means "lengthiest movie," w/ each person beyond 2 who speaks, legitimately, in the movie, increasing the "prize-length" of the movie by 1 minute; for example a "round-table"/"panel discussion" of 7 people, where each person is "in frame" throughout and has "a 'legitimate' speaking role," will increase the "prize-length" by 5 minutes; "additionally," for every 1000 views your movie has before August 03 the "prize-length" will be increased by 2 minutes).

Tips: have someone ask you something like "do you think [something] will [something]" and then "why" after you answer, seems like a person could easily talk within that format for 2+ minutes, saying things like "I don't know, it [something something] but [something something] or maybe [something something]."

CONTEST 3: FILM A PERSON SAYING "RICHARD YATES" IN A MANNER THAT CAUSES 3+ PEOPLE TO TURN THEIR BODIES, TO SOME DEGREE, TO LOOK AT [AFOREMENTIONED PERSON]

Film a movie where 3+ people turn their bodies, to some degree, upon hearing "Richard Yates," to look at the person who said "Richard Yates," w/ all participants "in frame" during the "relevant" portion of the movie (you can have other things in the movie if you want), can be "scripted" (something w/ friends) or non-scripted (saying "Richard Yates" loudly to "strangers" in a public area).

The movie where the most people "turn around" in the above manner will receive: $300 check + [package of "random ass shit" from my room, guaranteed to probably be worth ~$200-$5000 in ~2025 to NYU's "head archivist"].

Tips: maybe scream "Richard Yates" in Times Square w/ a friend filming from across the street or inside a building. For easy free books "simply" tell 3 of your friends [instructions] and then film one saying "Richard Yates" and the other 3 turning, repeating in 4 configurations for 4 free books.

OTHER INFORMATION

For this blog post "legitimate" is defined as "more than ~70% 'on topic' and w/o obvious 'gimmicks' like pasting the same sentence repeatedly, quoting 1000-word sections of other essays, having 30+ second 'silent' shots of landscapes, Photoshop'ing into a movie '1000 people turning their bodies to look at a person,' [other things of this nature]." People I know or "are friends w/" can participate, as the judging seems "objective," to a large degree, I feel, for the above contests. Motivated people can submit entries in each contest to receive 3 free books, but cannot submit more than one entry for each contest. "On topic" is defined as "about 'Richard Yates' (novel) and/or 'Tao Lin.'" I feel "flexible" re [things in this paragraph].

"3x contest" ends August 03, Tuesday, 10PM Eastern. Every entry will be linked at the top of this blog post. The 3rd contest has relevance to Richard Yates, to some degree, I feel. Thank you for your time/consideration.

control what i will be wearing in the september 'nylon'

*update* voting has ended, 4 is the winner, votes are in parenthesis, 'god damn you all' who voted 10 *update*

noah kalina is photographing me for nylon tomorrow re richard yates, i will wear whatever receives the most votes

1. defiance, ohio t-shirt, green (6)
2. american apparel long-sleeve button-down, black (1)
3. turtleneck that i'll buy from kmart/sidewalk tomorrow, [non-black/white] (10)
4. xanax v-neck designed by brandon scott gorrell, white w/ green lettering (683, including ~450 students from a psychology class and 45 from a 7th grade class, also + 'infinity' of whatever votes 10 got)
5. plaid long-sleeve button down, light blue/other (0)
6. rosa t-shirt, yellow (7)
7. graniph long-sleeve button down, green (2)
8. suit that i'll buy at a thrift store tomorrow (11)
9. layered '6 and 2' w/ 2 unbuttoned (4)
10. cum covering my 'face, hair, ears, neck, and hoodie' (336)
11. [specify something and i'll add it as 11, 12, etc., if it seems 'desirable' to me]

i 'reserve the freedom' to wear a 'hoodie' of my choice in an unzipped/open manner, my shoes will be black ipaths and my jeans will be 511 levi's, vote by typing [number] or [outfit] in the comments section before 3 pm eastern time 7/15, i will actually wear what receives the most votes, thank you for helping me with this potentially stressful decision

'thought catalog' published a 'piece' by me

re xanga, blogger, wordpress, livejournal, deadjournal, open diary, typepad, moveable type, wheatblog, tumblr

interview questions i 'feel interested in answering'/'feel less interested in answering'

i foresee answering 200-5000 questions the next ~5 months re richard yates and other things; to possibly cause my answers to be 'different than in previous years' and for things to seem 'more interesting,' to some degree, for myself and maybe other people, and also to create a giant list of questions that people, including me, can reference and possibly 'use,' in the future, as people interview other people, people interview me, and i interview other people, i have created two lists

'thought catalog' published a 'piece' by me

re king of kong, planet b-boy, baghead

sometimes my heart pushes my ribs (muumuu house, 2009) by ellen kennedy

has been reprinted and is available for $12 in a 2nd edition* featuring 'white text on spine'/'5x "fixed typo"'/'updated copyright page' relative to the 1st edition; read a story from it here, view complete information here, look at a nylon profile here

*made possible by jordan castro who loaned $1700 to me/'muumuu house'

my new formspring account

is the comments section of this interview, i will 'honestly answer' every question asked there (unless if it is information that might affect someone else in a manner that i'm not sure, to a certain degree, if they'll 'be okay with') for an amount of time

*update* the above 'offer' has ended, i will not be answering more questions in the comments section at this time, i encourage people to continue asking questions (if they want to) for other people to answer 'for me' (if they want to) using what i've expressed in my previous interviews/selected blog posts/[existence] as reference, if the question is specific/concrete, employing 'mla style citation' if possible; if the question contains abstractions 'simply' pretend you're a robot programmed to (1) 'be logical' (2) not have opinions/'rhetoric' (3) occupy the perspective of 'everything'/'nothing' (4) assume as little as possible and still be able to answer a question (5) know that it does not know everything *update*

'thought catalog' published a 'piece' by me

re marina abramović, if you write a '"legitimately" to me, 1000+ word' essay re my 'piece' on the internet somewhere & post a link in the comments section of this post & email binky.tabby [at] gmail [dot] com your address i will mail you sfaa or bed

*update* the above offer has ended, here are the essays: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13 *update*

'richard yates' is 'the rumpus book club' selection re august

information re 'richard yates' is here, information re 'the rumpus book club' is here and here (i think because 'richard yates' is paperback you will also get one other book for august, the paperback of the adderall diaries, i think)

new art & gallery show

most of these will be at hiding gallery 5/21, click them to view titles/larger, go here to view 'even larger'

'the official chuck palahniuk website' interviewed me

re shoplifting/'richard yates'/[other things]

i created a music video w/ gidgetsparks

relevant links: mp3, 'za party,' gidgetsparks myspace, '09 'hro' coverage, tao lin muxtape

~60x student re 'college of coastal georgia' are discussing stories from 'bed' on twitter

carla bluhm's 'introduction to human development' students are using twitter to discuss bed, the course instructions re 'tweeting' are here, the students' 'tweets' are here

selected 'tweets': 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35

i 'presented' a 3-part/2-hour 'lecture' at 'kansas city art institute' 4/02

go here to view the event flyer, ~20% of the 'learning tools' can be viewed here ('annotated timeline'), here ('"kmart realism" contextualized, to some degree'), and here (12x facial expression, as modeled by the 'hamster' template)

*update* i 'presented' the art segment at vassar 4/21, email binky.tabby [at] gmail.com if you are interested in 'hiring me' to 'present' the art segment at your [university/gallery/etc.] *update*

'shitstorm alberto' (the first shitstorm of the 2010-2011 season)

has developed into a category 5 shitstorm (320+ comments) with a 'fully-formed' epilogue, what some in the industry are calling 'a happy ending,' and an auxiliary system that ultimately failed to develop into what would have been 'shitstorm bernard' (in anticipation of a 'very active' season, or perhaps simply to promote itself, 'the weather channel' last week emailed me an exclusive list, to post on my blog, of the names of the first eight shitstorms of the 2010-2011 season, which, after 'alberto' and 'bernard,' are, should they form: 'carmichael,' 'damien,' 'farrod,' 'garrett,' 'harold,' ignatio')

relevant links: 'comprehensive, footnoted, quote-laden' history of 'shitstorm alberto' / giant comment by 'tao' with an 'egregious' typo in the first sentence / notably 'faultlessly punctuated' (for its 'length'/'sentence variety') comment by 'rebecca' / 'essay-comment' by 'l. fontana' originally posted as a comment within 'alberto,' reposted as its own system

2x film option, 3x foreign rights sale

shoplifting from american apparel has been optioned for film by sangha films and sold to france, to au diable vauvert, to the acquiring editor of david foster wallace in france

eeeee eee eeee has been optioned for film by kacper jarecki and sold to serbia, the translator's name is zoran trklja

cognitive-behavioral therapy has 'also' been sold to france; the french flag seems to be 'red, white, and blue,' i didn't know that; i see that the serbian flag seems to also be 'red, white, and blue'

other countries interested in purchasing 'foreign rights' are encouraged to contact my publisher here

'coverage' of items in this blog post can be viewed at moby lives, flavorpill, gothamist, the village voice, the new yorker, paste

24x poem by me

can be read here (12x), here (12x)

modular posted an 82-minute 'mixtape' by me

that is downloadable as one continuous mp3

i am creating an iphone app entitled 'north american hamsters'

to be published by nexstudios, it will feature in-depth (to some degree) profiles of 60x hamster 'native to north america & its environs,' view preview profiles of select hamsters here

*update* the below offer has ended, 'participants' will be updated at some point via email, thank you for your time *update*

due, among other reasons, to the 'already bleak' nature of this project, the 'already unconventionally satisfying (to me, to some degree)' nature of this project, and the loneliness i don't want to endure while 'documenting the lives'/'creating the portraits' of the often misanthropic, some say, hamsters of north america i am 'inviting the public,' in a way, to participate in this project by selling the 'naming rights' of 20 species for $65 each

paypal binky.tabby [at] gmail.com $65 and i will 'ignore' 'natural history,' to some degree, and name one of the 60 hamster species in the app '[your real name] hamster' or '[your company/website's name] hamster,' for example if your name is 'jonathan safran foer' and you paypal me $65 a hamster in the app will be named 'jonathan safran foer hamster,' if your name is gawker.com a hamster in the app will be named 'gawker.com hamster'

for the '0 - [infinity?]' years after this app 'goes viral' (and eventually becomes a 'nytimes best-selling' book ) people will read your name, read your bio, google your name, look at your blog or twitter account, and possibly purchase your products while 'certainly' increasing your hits; additionally, 1% of pre-tax profits will be donated to help nurture malnourished baby hamsters 'back to health' and eventually 'into the 9-5 workforce'

my 'reading diary'

can be viewed here