"Is anything real," an essay by Tao Lin showing how some things might not be real
Case Study #1, 2009
Apr 30 Brandon Scott Gorrell announces a short story contest run by Brandon Scott Gorrell. The contest guidelines say "i am going to choose the winning story based on how much i 'enjoyed' reading it."
May 23 Brandon Scott Gorrell posts the story he picked as winner of Brandon Scott Gorrell's short-story contest.
May 24 Michael Hemmingson says (~15th comment) the winner of the story contest does not exist and that he read a draft of the winning story, a month ago, authored by Tao Lin. ~30 minutes later Anonymous comments a link showing the winner exists.
May 24 Tao Lin says (~20-40th comment[s]) the story that won was written, at some point, to some degree, by Tao Lin, who then gave the story to someone else, the person who eventually won the contest. Tao Lin and Brandon Scott Gorrell say that Brandon Scott Gorrell did not have this information at the time Brandon Scott Gorrell chose the winner of the contest. Tao Lin lists the reasons he did what he did.
May 26 ~1:25 PM The Fiction Circus publishes an article called "Tao Lin Wins His Own Contest and Refuses to Refund the Entry Fee Money to the Other Contestants."
May 26 ~1:40 PM Edward Champion Twitters: "Did Tao Lin take prize money and defraud his fans? http://bit.ly/gPuBS." Edward Champion has 776 followers on Twitter.
May 26 ~3:30 PM Flavorpill Twitters: "Heh: Tao Lin wins his own writing contest. http://bit.ly/MLZca." Flavorpill has 3,284 followers on Twitter.
May 26 ~4:45 PM Brandon Scott Gorrell posts a response to the The Fiction Circus article, showing that almost every sentence in the article is factually incorrect, including three items in the article's title.
Case Study #2, 2008Jul 31 Tao Lin announces that he is selling shares of his next novel and in the announcement says the novel is "linear, focused on one relationship, and a 'page turner,' I think, though also rereadable. While writing it I have been focused on making it so that you both 'need to see what happens next' and 'can turn to any page and read it and feel interested.'"
Aug 4 The Telegraph publishes an article called "Penniless author sells shares in next novel" that says "Investors can pay $2,000 (£1,000) in return for a 10 per cent share of the royalties of Tao Lin’s as-yet-unfinished second novel."
Aug 5 The New Yorker's book blog says "Tao Lin is selling ten-per-cent shares of the royalties for an unfinished novel on his blog."
Aug 7 BBC Radio says "a penniless author has sold shares in the royalties of his next book which he hasn't even written yet."
Aug 22 Gawker posts a blog post called "How Tao Lin Made A Quick Twelve Grand Selling A Novel He Hasn't Written!" ~9500 people have viewed this post in entirety; perhaps more than ~100,000 have read the headline.
Aug 23 Gawker posts a blog post that says "Tao Lin, who recently raised $12,000 in investors' money for a book that doesn't even exist." That day, or the next day, Tao Lin's publisher emails Gawker saying the novel is 95% finished. That day or the next day, when the post is likely no longer on the front page, "doesn't even exist" is crossed out and replaced with "'95% finished,' according to Tao." ~4500 have viewed this post in entirety.
ConclusionThe above two case studies, in addition to books I have read about various industries, for example Serious Adverse Events by Celia Farber, combine to make it seem to me like information that is not source information is also very likely "not real," or, "not accurate" information. Seems like misinformation usually begins when entities (in these cases Michael Hemmingson, The Fiction Circus, various pharmeceutical companies) "just say anything," usually something "not factual but newsworthy," which then gets "picked up" by portions of the media (in these cases Flavorpill, BBC Radio, Gawker) which focus on what is "newsworthy" over what is "factual" to a degree that they do not check the source, which is often "one link away."
Why does that happen
Portions of the media, whether not for profit (The Fiction Circus, for example, I think) or for profit ("all of them," it seems, except maybe ones that "actually make a larger profit by 'upholding journalistic standards,'" like maybe the New York Times), won't write about something that isn't "newsworthy," because things not "newsworthy" don't get as many hits as things that are "newsworthy." Some of the media (the portion of the for profit mentioned earlier that is also publicly-owned) is existentially required to increase profits and therefore "have no choice" but to do what will get them the most hits, causing more advertising revenue. This is not the CEO's choice and not even the corporation's choice. If the CEO or some part of the corporation is not contributing to increased profits the shareholders (which, though, includes members of the corporation) will vote the CEO or CFO or whoever is "holding back" the corporation out of their position, and hire a new CEO or CFO or team of janitors or whoever.
Interlude
May 26 9:26 PM Muumuu House publishes "selections from Miles Ross' Twitter account."
How I view certain things, today, having "personally experienced" and also "read about" certain things in the last five yearsWhen I read things that are "newsworthy" I don't believe them, to some degree, a degree that increases based on factors I explained earlier. I automatically assume, to some degree, to a functional degree, I feel, that anything that is getting attention in the media is not accurate to a certain extent. I view many, or all, headlines, with a nearly-automatic assumption that it is not telling me accurate information, to some degree. I look at products with concrete (non-"artistic") functions and I try, firstly, to view the product (such as any medicine or vitamin or soap or cleaner or food, etc.) concretely and without preconception in order to see "what it really does," deliberately not believing the stated functions, to some degree
Epilogue re "Case Study #1"May 26 6:37 PM Brandon Scott Gorrell creates a forum for actual contestants to post their feelings re the contest.
44 Comments:
so you didn't get the $12,000?
so you didn't get the $8,100?
and nobody sent money to Brandon's contest that you/Brandon/Sarah now have?
"Is anything real"
You mean "Is everything I say a lie"
You're gonna pay tonight
Guarantee your beating will be real
Aww, Tao, don't get into HIV denialism. You are too smart for that shit.
But you are right in general - most of the media is sensationalist bullshit. HIV denialism is also sensationalist bullshit that can be disproved by lab tests.
the only remedy to this situation is go to seattle and shoot guns
the world will be happy if you put a video on vimeo of you shooting a gun at a gun range
if i had a gun i would mail it to seattle for you
ak-47
that last comment about the ak-47 seems a little impossible
.22 pistol should work
shoot up some old gateway monitors in seattle
Are you unhappy about this situation in which 'nothing' is 'real'? That would be unusual since ('you') are largely responsible for creating the unreality surrounding your escapades and have consistently benefited from that 'unreality'. 'You' should be extremely happy about the amount of 'attention' (you)(the Tao Lin fiction) receive, whether 'real' or not. If ("every writers voice is an artificial construct)'The Tao Lin fiction', "you" are unhappy about it, entering the competition in such a sly fashion was extremely unwise, since past experience should have warned you (the actual human being sitting there with one eye on your reputation and the other on your bank balance) what would happen. You (the son of your inventor father) should be the happiest, most contented writer in all the world, having invented a career from 'nothing' and had so much success with it at such a young age.
Tao, how does it feel to have all of these people assuming that everybody who entered Brandon's contest is a fan of yours?
*update re my health* i'm alive and haven't been 'beat down' *update re my health*
@ben i read the book and things seemed to make sense in it, and there's 'no money' in denying it, but a lot of money in not denying it, i feel, so in that sense it makes sense also
@krammer feels like it will cost ~$600 to do all that
@gingatao i did not type 'happy' or 'unhappy' in this blog post
@ryanbrosmer i think hundreds or thousands of people now think that it was a contest run by tao lin or muumuu house, which 'supercedes' them being my fans, or something, so i have not really thought about what you typed yet
did not follow directions of Brandon's forum. was instantly deleted. felt very 'real'
From a recent Yahoo News article
....."Neutral facial expressions" are required at departments of motor vehicles (DMVs) in Arkansas, Indiana, Nevada and Virginia. That means you can't smile, or smile very much. Other states may follow.
You are infiltrating the consciousness of DMV hipsters who shop at borders in four states
"i knew that if 'tao lin' won the contest a medium-large or large percentage of people would assume some kind of 'scam' had occurred, even if one had not occurred, due to brandon following his guidelines"
Why? Explain your reasoning as to WHY a large percentage of people would think such a thing.
Also, point blank, for the record, are you the author of any of Brandon Gorrell's writing, or the writing of any other Muumuu House writers?
@miracle because my publishing house, muumuu house, is publishing brandon's poetry book, and i'm friends with brandon, and if brandon -- even though his guidelines state that people he knows and is friends with can submit, even though his guidelines state that he will focus on what story he likes best, and that he predicts he will like stories by muumuu house writers more, statistically, than other writers -- chose me i feel many people would think he chose me for reasons other than he liked the story most, or was influenced by reasons other than he liked the story most
"Also, point blank, for the record, are you the author of any of Brandon Gorrell's writing, or the writing of any other Muumuu House writers?"
no
Simulacra and Simulation is a bit of an obsession of mine. You didn't quote The Matrix or 12 Monkeys or Frank Luntz. What can I say? The only way to fight against this is to research everything that you are interested in, and never trust anything. It is a good way to go through life, I think.
after having observed this entire 'shitstorm' from both a physical and emotional distance for quite a lot of time (~1 month), it seems to me that this is 'just as fucked as any other "thing"', but maybe a little more boring and 'drawn out' than say, 'my grandfather losing his battle with stomach cancer'
also there is much less money involved in this than in that hypothetical example of something less boring/'drawn out'
based on these observations, and having 'knowledge' of what's 'really going on' or something similar, i just want to say that the story that was allegedly written by tao lin (~1 month ago), was 'pretty sweet' regardless, and i personally hope that the 'reputation' of the story is in no way 'sullied' by the public perception of the events surrounding its release to the public
i honestly don't think that either blogger need say anything more, and would like to hear less 'buzz' and more 'white noise' from the halls of muumuu house, because i have other shit to do, in a 'less retarded' manner
also, tao, i think that this recap is 'pretty sweet'
I made this about Muumuu House and not Gorrell because it seems to me that Gorrell had very little to do with the dishonorable nature of what happened. I specified that Gorrell was running the contest. I still think it was "your contest."
I am certainly not out to get you and would classify myself as neither a fan nor enemy. More like a colleague who has winced before at your actions, although other people here at "The Fiction Circus" have indeed reviewed your work unfavorably.
But so what? You are young and talented, and perhaps you will write something amazing if you keep growing as a writer and don't destroy your reputation (and the reputation of an "at siege" industry) by preying on the trust of fans and well-wishers.
The fact of the matter is that the situation looks bad and you knew that it would look bad if you were to win this contest.
It would look...creepy.
You admit that you knew this fact going into it, and yet you still entered under an assumed identity to which you didn't own up until you were outed.
You can be a bigger person here than the "shit talkers" with a simple apology and by refunding the money to the contestants, or by graciously bowing out and letting the "runner-up" take the prize. You've proven your point already: the person that you are publishing likes your writing. You are a better writer than your fans and imitators, I guess.
If you bowed out with a smile, you would actually look very noble, even if you were completely in the right. Offering to "refund the money to anyone who asks" does not count as refunding the money that you won. The onus is on you to appear as if you are not profiting from a possibly-tainted writing contest.
For instance, what are you going to do with the lifetime subscription to Muumuu House (the #1 prize in this contest) and a copy of your own book? Man, at least give THAT shit to the runner-up, right? You can admit that such a thing is not really much of a prize to you?
Anyway, Dr. Future has posted a response to Gorrell's response at The Fiction Circus, if you are interested.
tao
i'm starting to feel like you might be an idiot
one time i talked shit on the internet and then got shit talked to me in real life and then all sorts of friendlessness started happening and i was confused and self-doubting for a while. i don't know if that has any relevance. anyway. more importantly, what did people think about tao lin's story? i really liked the last line about 'experiencing things vaguely'. i feel like that sort of story wouldn't get past a b+ in the creative writing course i'm enrolled in, which slightly saddens me. was there 'dramatic tension'? purposeful 'scene construction'? a clear 'narrative arch'? maybe.
I just found the short story shitstorm bitchen and funny.
thumbs up tao.
See. What I did here was offer a question mark behind my tweet, hoping that other people would look into Miracle Jones's understandable concerns. A question mark does not indicate that I believed or disbelieved this bullshit. I am familiar with your hijinks and your fear of being real. What my tweet really indicated was this: Is Tao Lin a fucking sociopath? Washed up? Is he a guy who likes to fuck with people's heads for kicks?
I was kind enough to offer a "review" of THE BRANDON BOOK CRISIS with this in mind, playing into your tired pranksterism. But you've preyed off that good will and you've preyed off the good will of other people. Miracle Jones is a good guy.
But, hey, don't worry. You're not getting any more attention from me in any of the outlets that I write for. I will no longer review your books or write about you in any way. And I will encourage all of my peers, friends, accomplices, and assigns to do the same. One day, like others you know and who I could name, people who have been too terrified to be real or to stand for anything, you'll wake up not long from now and wonder why you're so alone. Because guess what? You can't be young forever.
if you don't go to seattle and shoot a gun the whole contest will seem like a sham in my opinion
i think the contest would be more validated in my mind if you went to seattle picked up a stick and said bang
extreme validation if you fire a real gun.
put one of your books/artwork on ebay with a bullet hole through it and the trip will practically pay for itself
becoming more pissed when i think of you sitting around libraries in new york not considering a trip to seattle.
kayak.com says if you left today it would cost $238 round trip
if you give me $100 i will fly to seattle and shoot holes in some of your books and then mail them to you to sell on ebay so you won't actually be losing $100.
i imagine one of your books with a bullet hole in it would sell for about $30-$73
i have outlined many options.
most of these options would legitimize the contest
From Chase Kamp, the runner-up in this contest:
"we were also aware that the winner of the contest might be considered for publishing by MuuMuu House, as hinted at by Brandon early on too. We figured that whoever won would likely write in the vein of MuuMuu House. We both thought the contest was probably a way for MuuMuu House to scout new talent, or at least to assess the work of other young writers who have no desire to pander to the ivory tower literary world."
"since Tao Lin probably already has a copy of Ellen Kennedy's new collection, maybe someone could receive that as a second-runner-up prize? Maybe Tao Lin already has other books in the winning prize pool and those could be handed out?"
Do you want to address these claims as well, considering the fact that this is the guy you beat?
fucking go to seattle tao. shoot a gun.
Posted on May 7th about this contest by Gorrell:
"*CONTEST UPDATE RE: MUUMUU HOUSE* ever wonder how to get published by muumuu house? if you win the contest, your chances of getting noticed by muumuu house increase! *CONTEST UPDATE RE: MUUMUU HOUSE*"
So have your chances of getting published by Muumuu House increased?
Posted by Gorrell on May 11th:
*important* i have received a question about this contest which i would like to address publicly. the question was "the contest isn't rigged, is it?'
the answer is "i am going to choose the winning story based on how much i 'enjoyed' reading it. whichever story produces the most 'enjoyment' will win. i feel unsure how you can rig this contest. you can rig slot machines. seems like you couldn't 'rig' something like this, 'provided' you believe my claim that the winning story will be chosen based on my level of 'enjoyment' while reading it"
Should I keep digging?
what the fuck is happening to you tao it's like you are stupid or some shit
i am thinking that i am probably going to burn all of those books that you mailed me
Also, Philip K. Dick writes about what is real: http://deoxy.org/pkd_how2build.htm - this essay is referenced in Waking Life at the end.
Also, I think this whole "controversy" is funny. And I laugh thinking about it. The idea that people feel "defrauded" out of $7 in a competition that was decided by someone that didn't know that he knew who the winner was until after he was awarded the winner is all pretty silly.
I've lost writing competitions before. That's part of life. Well, not for everybody, some people never enter writing competitions. Then they never lose.
But maybe this is more about wanting to gain notoriety? To be noticed? To get published?
Has anyone here written a story about losing a writing competition and then submitted that story to a writing competition? I haven't...
@EDWARD CHAMPION
"See. What I did here was offer a question mark behind my tweet, hoping that other people would look into Miracle Jones's understandable concerns. A question mark does not indicate that I believed or disbelieved this bullshit."
this blog post only quoted your 'tweet,' it didn't comment on it at all
"I am familiar with your hijinks and your fear of being real. What my tweet really indicated was this: Is Tao Lin a fucking sociopath? Washed up? Is he a guy who likes to fuck with people's heads for kicks?"
yes, i feel your 'tweet' probably indicated something like that; this blog post does not interpret your 'tweet,' only quotes it, linking to the original 'tweet'
"I was kind enough to offer a "review" of THE BRANDON BOOK CRISIS with this in mind, playing into your tired pranksterism. But you've preyed off that good will and you've preyed off the good will of other people. Miracle Jones is a good guy."
do you think this blog post 'preys' off that 'good will,' i'm honestly confused
"But, hey, don't worry. You're not getting any more attention from me in any of the outlets that I write for. I will no longer review your books or write about you in any way. And I will encourage all of my peers, friends, accomplices, and assigns to do the same. One day, like others you know and who I could name, people who have been too terrified to be real or to stand for anything, you'll wake up not long from now and wonder why you're so alone. Because guess what? You can't be young forever."
because of this blog post, or because of something else? confused
@MIRACLE JONES
i have responded to chase kamp's commentary on brandon's blog; if anyone that entered the contest wants a free copy of ellen kennedy's book please email muumuuhouse@gmail.com your address and i will mail you a copy
about the two things you quoted brandon as saying...i 'fail' to see how that changes anything, in my view, the two items:
1. the winner would more likely be noticed by muumuu house
seems 'obvious' to me; i feel that brandon said that because it would help convince some people to enter, which seems normal
2. that brandon would choose the story he liked most and that the contest was not rigged
brandon stating that the contest is not rigged seems normal to me, in that he was asked a question and he answered it directly
about your other thing, that it would look 'creepy' if i won, yes, i agree that many people would think that, which they have, but a lot of things, though 'harmless,' or 'fair' (in this case people who entered the contest read certain guidelines, and the contest was actualized and completed within those guidelines) seem 'creepy' to large percentages of people, due to illogical or maybe 'emotional' biases, such as people disliking certain sexual preferences, races, 'ghost writing,' 'hating' certain foods, feeling 'afraid' of technology, or something, etc., and i feel comfortable 'not providing non-logical support to people who have illogical biases but to provide logical thought processes with which people can come to have less illogical biases'
for example if someone hated gay people, and i was a gay person, i wouldn't 'appease' them by giving them money, i would maybe do something like explain concretely and logically how their 'hatred' is illogical, or something
james chapman posted a comment that i felt made clear what has happened in a direct, easy-to-understand manner; thank you james:
" chapman said...
these words are in the guidelines, and also in brandon's first comment:
"i have decided to allow people affiliated with 'muumuu house' to join my contest."
after that, there's nothing to talk about. by the rules, tao could enter, tao could win.
and if you thought about it, you would see that he was quite likely to win.
(the whole thing about sarah is a red herring. tao could sign his story "steven king" as long as steven king agreed. sarah agreed to the use of the pen name.)
(that wasn't a trick to get tao into the contest, because according to the rules tao had the right to enter anyway.)
if you read the rules, it was clear that y'all were betting your $7 in a competition against some of brandon's favorite writers and people.
i personally didn't wanna bet $7 on my own odds in that competition.
i don't think writing contests should be run like that, but they always are. one way or another they're always loaded in favor of the friends of the contest-maker.
but brandon's, unlike the usual crooked contest, put the honest information right up front: "i have decided to allow people affiliated with 'muumuu house' to join my contest."
sinec tao won, the money is his. he can keep it, or give it back, or give any percentage of it to sarah, who is supposedly the "owner" of the story and theoretially the owner of the prize.
but that's between him and sarah, isn't it?"
@ Edward Champion
"One day, like others you know and who I could name, people who have been too terrified to be real or to stand for anything, you'll wake up not long from now and wonder why you're so alone."
R U stupid? The older you get the easier it is (and healthier) to stand for nothing. 'Not dying along' and 'standing for things' is for people in their 20s without healthcare.
Tao is prematurely, sensually, and realistically old. Chill out kiddo.
"sensually,"
'damn'
i hate to beat a dead horse, but will guns be shot in seattle?
Look, you can't win an argument with Tao Lin. He posts all this abstract crap. The best thing to do is just ignore him because the truth is the only friends he has are friends he's gotten from being a writer online, that he has no identity apart from that, that he's a pathetic lost soul who googles himself constantly in search of some kind of validation which nevertheless eludes him, that ignoring him is the only way to treat him. No doubt some kid will tell me I am fucking crazy but who cares? You can get stupid kids (under 25-30 depending on their maturity level) and adults like Miracle Jones or Edward Champion don't belong here and should not write about Tao or Muumuu House anymore. He's got enough people praising him and justifying anything he's done. You can search this blog going back to its inception and you will never see Tao say "I'm sorry" for anything or "I apologize" for anything, because he is too scared to do so. Don't reply to this, Tao. If you do, I won't read it. I won't read anything by you and I'll try to avoid reading anything about you. I feel sorry for you, because you know, you're not that happy a person now, and as Ed said, this is probably the high point of your life as you become a pathetic aging hipster, a figure as comic as the stereotypical 50yo hippie. Good luck. You'll need it.
and if you thought about it, you would see that he was quite likely to win.if you read the rules, it was clear that y'all were betting your $7 in a competition against some of brandon's favorite writers and people.Tao,
Those quotes are accurate. In his contest rules, Brandon was essentially admitting, "If you're not one of my friends entering this contest, especially Tao Lin, you're probably not going to win, because I am judging this contest based on what I 'enjoy' and my friends, especially Tao Lin, are what I enjoy."
What you and James Chapman are saying is that everyone who entered this contest and didn't realize this would happen was duped by their emotions, and is illogical to be angry. And I guess fully deserves to lose $7.
However, I think this contest was kind of mean-spirited (in the sense of "suggesting a meager spiritual nature") and not classy, and I am asking for a refund.
It seems I was duped, because I didn't think Brandon Gorrell would actually create such an obviously unfair situation (i.e. let his friends enter the contest for money, knowing he'd probably "enjoy" their entries the most, for blatantly subjective reasons, while nonetheless inviting the public to enter as well, happily taking their money, yet knowing they didn't have much of a chance, unless they wrote like Tao Lin--which no one can do as well as Tao Lin, it seems).
Probably Brandon Gorrell wasn't trying to scam people. Probably he thought he was being "funny" and "sarcastic" by admitting right off the bat that he wasn't even going to try to be objective in judging this story contest, unlike what one would expect of the judge of a story contest (i.e. that the judge of a story contest would at least try to be objective--it would have to be a judge who was not as discerning as Brandon Gorrell, though--it would have to be a judge who is unaware of the "existential meaninglessness" of all judgments).
Probably you guys weren't explicitly trying to scam people. Probably Tao Lin was just being mercenary & opportunistic (but not quite a scammer), and Brandon was just being "aware of meaninglessness" or something. However, because money was involved, it turned out to be in the nature of a scam. Or, if not explicitly a scam, at least sort of an asshole-like and unpleasant thing to do. And I would like my $7 back.
@XM
brandon stated that he would choose the story he likes the most
brandon knows what kinds of writing he likes, and what writers he likes, and he was direct and honest with that in the guidelines
he didn't say something like 'i might choose a story that i normally don't like' as a way to 'lure' more contestants
he instead said something like 'i know what stories i like [and then named what writers he likes], and i am, in this contest, going to choose what story i like most'
then he chose what story he liked best
then you commented here that you want a refund, seemingly and 'blatantly' ignoring the guidelines with which you entered brandon's contest
email me if you want a refund, binky.tabby at gmail.com, i will give you a refund
seems kind of funny
there is something very lame about posting the value of your checking account in a pathetic hipster play for "street cred." there is a real economic crisis you fucking douche. only the wealthy flaunt their poverty. being fashionably poor is quite different from being actually poor. the truth is that tao lin has 1300 in his checking account and the safety net of family loot. (nyu tuition is 40+k/year, or is he paying off all those student loans with the cash he rakes in from poo-poo house?) see this article for elaboration: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/08/nyregion/08trustafarians.html?_r=2
there is nothing more annoying than hipster assholes trying on poverty as if it were an outfit and then crying starving artist in defense of reprehensible behavior. way to appropriate even the disadvantages of the underclass, you assholes. why not claim you are autistic or have the empathetic capacity of a mosquito and are therefore entitled to be a dick.
i'd like to think that the joy of an artist is, as george bernard shaw said, "to see things that never were and ask, "Why not?" but the winning story reads as if it were written by a computer program designed to approximate human writing by asking the question: i see things that are, and ask what? and once i ascertain the what, how can i make it even more witless?
i guess maybe, as charlie parker said, if you ain't lived it, it won't come out your horn. and since tao and his crew spew forth a constant stream of crap, i'm gonna just have to assume that the life experiences behind those paltry, tepid stories are as sad as the following sentence: "She stood suddenly and dizzily walked in an aimless manner toward a piece of a paper on the dresser."(though you could sub most any excerpt from the story). thanks to you fuckers a whole lot of idiot imitator automatons will now fill their writing-profusely, awkwardly and in a retarded, sometimes aimless manner-with adverbs. cause that's what's wins "contests." and that's a much worse crime than taking seven dollars from somebody.
ps: i am holding another contest. the best shit talking post gets the prize. that is, the post that i feel most cleverly and amusingly talks shit wins. i already know that none of you fools have a retort to this post that's as good as what i just typed, but if you want to enter the contest, go ahead and talk some shit. you've already lost, bitches. let's continue this shitstorm!
nota bene, motherfuckers: i posted this on bsg's site, but since it is my intention to increase criticism and shit talk i am posting here as well.
feel alienated
dont really care that tao won
i might have smiled a little when i found out it was tao all along
*is life actually modeled after scooby doo?*
but it has no real impact on me
nervous that soo many ppl are mad about this
i just bought 1 book from tao and 1 book from brandon
this is because i received my direct deposit finally, and not because i am strongly against these negative commenters
but if i had read this before i ordered, i might have bought them because of the strong sense of conviction this thread has given me
i just noticed there are no dates on these comments.
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