lara glenum assigned
you are a little bit happier than i am for her poetry class in georgia
i'm going to blog about what happened
no one has asked me to blog about this or talk about this, i'm doing it anyway, i think it'll be of some interest to some of the people in the class; some of them have found me on myspace and emailed me and done things like that
i think i'll write this like a short story
i'm going to write this in
noah cicero's autobiography's voice; he wrote an autobiography and i read some of it after he emailed it to me
Visit to Lara Glenum's Poetry ClassTao Lin walked behind Joyelle McSweeney and Lara Glenum at the University of Georgia in Athens. Tao took a photo of Joyelle McSweeney and Lara Glenum's asses, backs, backs of heads with his cell phone and sent it to his girlfriend's email.
"Let me go in to get them ready," Lara Glenum said. Tao Lin stood outside the classroom with Joyelle McSweeney.
"Do you like coffee?" said Joyelle McSweeney.
"Yeah," Tao said. Then they each went into the bathroom.
Tao Lin went into the classroom. Tao Lin sat adjacent Lara Glenum. Tao Lin looked around. Tao Lin saw someone with a shaved head and a beard and a lot of other people, including one person who he had had dinner with the night before. That was all Tao Lin processed when he looked around the classroom of about fifteen people.
Someone asked Tao Lin a question. Tao Lin answered the question.
Someone asked Tao Lin about Bear Parade. It was the man with the shaved head and a beard. "I'm not really an editor for it," Tao Lin said. "I mean I look at the submissions and reject some people, I write some of the rejection letters, but I'm not really an editor. I guess I am an editor." Some people laughed. Tao Lin paused. Tao Lin said, "Gene Morgan is the main editor. He makes the decisions. The acceptance rate is 0%. We haven't accepted anyone who hasn't been solicited."
Someone asked Tao Lin for advice. Tao Lin felt wise. He was about to say something wise. "If you look at a magazine and think that your writing is a lot better than anything in that magazine, then you probably shouldn't submit to that magazine, because your writing probably isn't better it's just different," Tao Lin said. He felt wise. He looked around to see if anyone would say anything to indicate Tao Lin was wise. Yes, someone was. It was Lara Glenum. Lara Glenum said something that indicated Tao Lin had just said something wise.
Next Joyelle McSweeney talked about the Action Books' December Prize. Tao Lin listened politely.
"You look afraid," someone said to Tao Lin.
"Fuck you," thought Tao Lin.
"I'm just being myself," Tao Lin said. "So fuck you," Tao Lin thought automatically.
The person who Tao Lin had had dinner with along with Kristen Iskandrian, Sabrinah Orah Mark, Joyelle McSweeney, Sandy Florian, and someone who talked about nutritional yeast a lot, but was allergic to it, but ate it anyway had not said anything. Tao Lin felt that this person did not like Tao Lin, which Tao Lin was okay with, since Tao Lin felt like he was acting like an ass and everything he said was stupid and self-righteous.
At one point Tao Lin said, "If you published things you think are stupid on the internet you shouldn't care about that."
Tao Lin also said at one point, "When I wrote those poems I felt severely depressed and and was alone. Some of them I wrote because I would be sitting there and I wouldn't know what else to do except write, because I felt so horrible and there was nothing to do and I was alone. It would just be the only thing I could do," to which Lara Glenum said, "I know that feeling."
Tao Lin automatically thought, "I doubt it," but then corrected that bad thought and thought, "Oh, good," and felt connected with Lara Glenum a little, and viewed her poetry a little differently, with more interest. All that happened in about 5 seconds and was isolated, it did not affect the rest of Tao Lin's life.
At one point, also, Tao Lin idlely and meaninglessly thought, "Fuck everyone in this classroom including Tao Lin." The thought had no meaning and wasn't true. Tao Lin felt a little confused by it.
Someone said something about how he put an excerpt from Tao's book as his AIM away message and eighteen people had messaged him saying it was a good and funny quote. Tao Lin automatically thought, "Did you attribute it to me?" Tao Lin thought about saying that out loud because some people would laugh but he felt depressed and didn't say anything. Someone said something about reading blurbs for the book. The man with the beard said he didn't have a life and read Tao Lin's blog a lot.
Tao Lin stood up and felt wise. Joyelle McSweeney stood up and probably felt normal, maybe she felt wise, I don't know. Tao Lin and Joyelle McSweeney walked out of the classroom.
Outside Joyelle McSweeney said, "You can go do your own thing for a while, it won't hurt my feelings."
"Okay," Tao Lin said. "I'm going to find the internet." Tao Lin found the internet and read emails.
that was stupid
that's not really noah's voice in his novel, i messed up
